we change form, we live on

can we ever say the word freedom enough?

TY is a truly wonderful person. He knew I was a drifter, wanderer, gypsy-spirit, free spirit, hummingbird, floater, bouncer when he met me. Never once did he tell me that I should settle down or change. His gentle way accepted me just as I accepted him for being a steady type. Kudos to my first husband, who remains a good friend, because he understood as well. And he loved that about me. TY never told me I'd have to grow up and get a steady job someday, or settle down in one place.

I've really taken for granted how free TY allows me to be. If I tell him I'm running off to Europe for a week long vending opp, he says have a good time baby. If I run out for a night of dancing with friends he leaves the light on. And it's reciprocal..sometimes I have to push and encourage but I put a surfboard in his arms and direct him towards the beach. And he comes back with a smile.

I've met some people with relationships and they do everything together. Which is great, but the relationship style I've always been drawn to allows growth of each person separate from each other as well. There's no need to make TY suffer thru hours of bellydance dvds, or take him to every show. And I'll never like volleyball. I also don't like board games. But we do like movies, and of course we share a love for the water together. No one else gets it like a surfer. No one else but another island inhabitant gets the lifestyle here, or the little details that a non-resident would miss. He's been here much longer than I have..about 8 years longer.

I remember when we met, other than an attraction to him (hey, he's dark and cute) we liked each other because we both loved the water and we both didn't want to leave Hawaii. We are equally as excited by travel to other destinations but we know a beach life is a good one. We both are satisfied each day by putting the kid in the stroller and teaching him the water life, and taking turns going out in the waves by ourselves. I'm usually the hyper excited one who will describe in detail each wave and ride. He smiles and affirms he had a good session. But we both know.

I value those things about him, but I also value that he does not make any requirement of me to be with him. I always remind him if he is ever unhappy with anything that we can change it (like if he hates a job, etc). And he always says no baby i just want to be with you and Zackie, the rest is small stuff.

TY really taught me a lot about living simple. When I moved to Hawaii with two suitcases and a car that I should have left in San Fran, I had to learn how to live in a closet space. Where he came from, not a rich family, but an honest one who worked hard. He grew up playing with simple things instead of elaborate toys. I'm glad he can pass that on to Zack.

We have enough, every day. Fresh banana and coffee. A walk first thing on the beach each morning. I have the freedom to choose each day if I want to study or do art. I am so lucky. Mahalo TY, no one gets it like you do.