sedona gypsy magic

gawd i love being back in arizona. after a few days in phoenix doing must do's we trekked to sedona. i couldn't wait any longer. of course i went straight to boynton canyon after a quick appetizing drive thru oak creek canyon to glimpse the changing trees.
Boynton has a fast electric zapping energy. Just driving down the road towards the canyon I get jumpy and hyper. I actually sat up at the rock center today and started giggling uncontrollably. James felt silly too. We have pictures to prove it. I have to find the camera adapter first to load it to computer.

I was hit by so many new ideas and I hope I was able to write them all down on the itouch for future use. i would close my eyes and see colors and garments. everything i've ever loved about cool clothing has come back since i've been on the mainland. i love living in hawaii but style and new ideas can get a bit stale. i need the pulse of the arizona land to remind me .

many new pictures to share. and i'll need to dump the old website since it will be easier to build a new one. it's fun to build.

picked up some juniper ghost beads since i've been having bad dreams since i got to arizona. hope it's just nerves settling. it's tough to accept i'm back here despite it being voluntary and perhaps temporary.

Mayo clinic informed me that I have been accepted for a clinical rotation starting soon. I am shocked that I didn't have to interview for it..I'll be rotating on med surg oncology and hope to land a job there when i'm done. google mayo it's pretty big. i feel very privileged to be able to do a clinical there.

the magic truck arrived and dumped a lot of project in front of me. nursing clinical, new ideas, new website. i hope i can make some progress on the new item ideas before i lose motivation but nursing is going to take 100% for at least one month.

a ten year cycle

ten years ago i could not wait to leave phoenix, arizona..i was finishing up my nursing school and was counting the days until i could leave that hot dry hell hole. ten years later, after living in hawaii for four years, i am ready to go back and spend some time getting rock solid experience in nursing again. funny how life cycles us back to the same rock we came from

i don't know when i'll be back on the island. am looking forward to daily winter sunshine and tall dry mesas again. am looking forward to driving fast on open highways and watching dust storms approach from the estrellas. am looking forward to my tenants leaving should i be there in april, as a gorgeous four bedroom house awaits that's mine all mine.


sometimes life on the island wraps you up and you forget what your other dreams are. you spend your time collecting shells and fishing to get by to remain on the island and then there comes an opportunity to sit on a solid rock again and build a foundation. and maybe find a new island for summer break.

there's been a recent breakdown of everything lately. what appears to be an earthquake is just shifting the bad bricks out ..and determining if the land is worth building on again. arizona is that land right now, it's forever, it's eternal. it's home. i'll miss hawaii but it's nearing winter in hawaii right now and the summer blazing energy is gone. the tourists have gone home and i'm sad to see them go. it's time to park it near a cactus with a notebook and reorganize. laptop on hand..

Sedona vortex

more on this later..just starting a tag vortex for later

da beetch izz back

my dad and brothers raised a bitch. they are rather tough guys who dont put up with shit from anyone. they are fair and wonderful and generous but they dont put up with shit. they passed a lot of this on to me. they taught me to take care of myself and not depend on a man to do it for me. they taught me how to avoid being a rug (although there are many times i'm still prone)

i feel like i inhaled the mana of the desert, my homeland, and am back and i feel strong. i already miss the clear blue sky and dust that settles on everything. it's raining here. the big island is not our place. even if this house doesnt work out for whatever reason this is still not our place. it has been a wonderful place to camp out for the past year, and absorb its beauty but we are not home. i'm not sure if anywhere will ever be home but it's not here

my nickname when i lived in the desert was Selket. a dear friend used to call me Selkie which is far from the meaning and power of Selket, scorpion queen. I suppose even the scorpion queen of darkness needs a softer playful woman into seal playing in the waves side.

woke at 5 this morning since i'm still in time with the desert. i have a list of people to call and bitch at (insurance related, etc..assholes dropped our policy despite our three calls a day to get ahold of someone to pay SINCE jan 2nd. i wonder how their phone lines can get so crossed. here we are waving money at them and the other department cancels it. also the repairs on our condo unit were supposed to be done jan 19. i'm about to get out the whip and crack it in a few places. maybe a good lashing of my stinging tail will get them moving huh

and today i have the urge again to paint some wildly fantastic southwest capes and dresses. bright wildflower gold. silvery sage green. LOTS of copper. how could i ever have thought phoenix was brown and dry and ugly? which glasses was i wearing?

still..it's fun to fly back 'home' to hawaii along with a plane of tourists. i see everything from their eyes. the anticipation before we land is contagious. everyone has left behind a six hour passage to a fun zone. a place that is ideal where one can escape and experience something new. thank you hawaii, for hosting me these years. thank you for the surf and the man and the baby (we still dont know if he was made in hawaii or phoenix during our last trip :)

i think i may take a day to be a tourist. try it. go about your day today as if you are a tourist in your own city. what do you like? what is home to you? what do you not like? what can you change? what must you accept?

i have no problem pulling the plug

if these silly home loan people keep jacking up what they quoted as a price on that house i'll simply not buy it. i can very easily raise the eyebrows and walk away from it. them and their tricky writing and get-to-the-table-and-have-a-higher-payment-than-stated yeah i know all about home loans that become suddenly this inflated prison sentence. aint worth it. if we can't get that house for the original quoted price we'll just walk.

Selket

i drove the boys to the Superstition mountains today, hoping to show them so many trails i used to walk when i lived here many years ago. i remember most of the turn offs and parking places to access various trails, tho most of the time in the past i would just start hiking and not follow a trail

if you look down when you walk your eyes will search for clear crystals embedded in swirly tan canyon rocks. sometimes you can find a vein of crystals in the riverbeds. we stepped out into this one clearing and the scent of the desert was easy to pick up. i'm not sure when it rained here last, there was the average amount of silver green sage growing everywhere but the ocotillo and prickly pear hadn't bloomed yet.

of course i'm experiencing cold moccasins about moving here. how many days will i sit there and say wtf why did we move here. probably the first day of summer when they announce the first wave swell of the season in hawaii. it's ok i won't look at the surf report. i'll be tracking the monsoons so we can visit sedona and the canyons surrounding flagstaff.

it will be easier to escape when i have my own house to park our hiking boots at. our house is considerably closer to the superstitions than my parents house. it will probably add at least half an hour to any drives to flagstaff or sedona but then again tucson is closer too and tucson has sabino? canyon. which is another desert jewel.

i have as much fun re-exploring places i've already been than looking up new spots to go. the old spots bring back so many memories and i often think about how much life has changed but how a person can remain the same. perhaps splinter into different things but the core is still there.

some of us always return to the desert

kween of kopper

so despite the risk that my henna'd hair may turn green if it was dyed over, i turned it over to the colorist and told her i wanted deep sangria burgundy red hair with copper and red rock highlights. i've never been happier with my hair..wish the length was there but at least there's something interesting to look at now. it gets me back in glam mode. i've been wearing torn sarongs and no makeup for far too long. hair color changes everything.

i dont miss dyeing things yes. i do like staring at colors and thinking about it but this week my brain has been consumed with checking on nursing jobs of where i'd LIKE to work in an ideal situation. TY and i have placed a friendly challenge on each other that I will get a better paying job before he does, if that is the case he may just work part time or not at all, and watch the baby. there are , of course, quite a number of opportunities in arizona, last night i made a list of links i'd like to explore. i sure can't do that while i'm listing things on etsy. it's gotta be one or the other. interesting..my chinese horoscope said i would be making a significant career change this year that would lead to more financial security. TY and i know that if we both worked full time (him in his job and my job as a nurse) that we could pay off our new house in under two years. i could work full time to do that. even back in nursing jobs i'm not so thrilled about i could do that again, for a year, to pay off a house.

dropping akai back to part time or fun only would take a lot of pressure off ..i could clock out at the end of the day and go home and not have to answer emails or give up another weekend to dye things. i know that sounds pretty spoiled but i have not really had much time off for the past ten years. some people think when you run your own business you have freedom and can choose to not work. in many cases that's true but in most cases you end up working more. and feel guilty if you are not working.

ok not that akai is going bye bye forever. just a break. hiatus. still squeak out a few things when needed but instead focus on a career where i am still working with women and helping them to feel beautiful, but in a different way. healing but with something other than silk.

so we arrived at midnight monday and we were up by 9am, out the door and we found our house by 2pm..it was the fifth one we looked at..i don't have photos of it other than the ones we took with our camera as it was not an active listing yet, our agent is an investor in the area and knew it was going to be listed for 110k so he had an inside advantage

loved the neighborhood instantly, it's on the border of queen creek and florence, az, about 45 minutes from my parents. met one of the neighbors, an older gal with two nice dogs , her name was Laura too

i walked inside and sunlight was flooding the house..the first thing that came into focus was my husband's face, we looked at each other and said oh yeah this is the one. you know how you just know? island what island. out of sight out of mind.

the house is 2200+ sq ft, much more than we need, but hey. it's a four bedroom three bath, one bedroom and bath is downstairs and the rest is upstairs. the floorplan rules, the kitchen is not the first thing you see when you walk in , instead is a formal living room and then a family room behind it, separated by a thick wall, and the kitchen/eating area is combined. opens to a covered patio in back. the yard will need landscaping ie cactus since right now it's only dirt. nice side yard, fully fenced for Lewis.

the kitchen has dark cherry cabinets and a black countertop, black appliances, black sink , has large tiles diagonally placed in the kitchen and bathroom, and upstairs bathroom. walls are pure white thank goodness, there seems to be a trend every other house we looked at had walls that were beige, golden or burgundy. nice but i'd rather be the one to decide ya know. LARGE windows and plenty of them , the house faces east and the entire house was LIGHT and airy , no dark shadows, no chill. vaulted ceilings, two car garage, kitchen was spacious and full of light. i really dig that all the appliances and counter were black, it looks very bachelor pad. brand new carpeting thru-out, a dark brown color. i'm not into carpet so we will at some point rip it out and replace with tile, probably saltio? reddish color patio big tiles or something

the best part is its ours for 85k. it's a few years old, we get the inspection on friday. of course we all know how house deals goes its not yours till it's signed and keys are in hand. but this thing just fell in our laps with ease and hardly any negotiations .

our payments with 10% down will be about $550/month..(that's the best part) . association fees about 50/month and that includes common maint. sewage and trash pickup, possibly cable i'll have to check.

we honestly just came here to check out jobs and house situation but things just happened. not sure when we will be leaving hawaii, we want to stay thru our lease of course which ends in april so our new house may sit vacant for a month or so or if we plan to stay in hawaii longer we will rent out the house for a six month lease but we CAN just let it sit vacant if we're gonna be here late spring. we're still figuring out if we are going to sell the condo in hawaii, or continue to rent it out and then we will both work a couple more months at least to safe for a buffer..chances are, TY won't be transferring here with the job.

I have a meeting with two different surgeons tomorrow, i dont have my RN license active again yet but can get it active again thru a school that AZSBON recognizes and i can be practicing with a preceptor again within 8 weeks to 6 months of us arriving in az. i'm asking the surgeons if they will allow me to do my preceptorship with one of their trained nurses ..i'll be doing pre and post op care of patients getting boobs and tucks and stuff and they will train me how to do botox injections, laser, etc. the laser portion will require an extra class (have to get that verified by state of az). if i work as a nurse again any time soon it will be on part time terms only, if full time is possible i'll have to think that thru..maybe TY can stay with the baby or maybe he'll be with grandma a couple days if we both work. i have the training to make 6 figures again and am considering it :)

but of course will still be doing akai, possibly more at a hobby level or part time. we'll see what happens and when. i could never stop dyeing in fact have had so many ideas since we hit the desert so akai will still go on, it may be more selective we'll just see ..for now, as of now when i get back i'll still be doing things as normal but it does look like i'll still need at least a weekend to heal after wisdom teeth are removed, may as well get it done.

feels sooo good to be home, am on about 7 hours of sleep for the last two days so i'll catch up with email requests when we are done with business..still a lot to do while we're here and we want to hit sedona this weekend then celebrate superbowl sunday ..go Phx cardinals.

Moki is taller than TY..i took him to a gory vampire movie, Underworld? loved it ..he plays guitar so well now that i weep with pride ")
love you all

bright and bold

tomorrow many fellow citizens and travellers will hate me since we are flying for six hours with a baby. a baby with his own mind and wishes who doesn't undertand things outside his own sphere yet. i'm planning on taking a dose of benadryl to make me groggy enough to not snap at people when they glare at me cuz the kid is fussing. hey peeps i don't want to do this either. six hours on a plane just by myself is bad enough but with a baby!!!! i'm going to make a public apology and general announcement of warning about our baby to everyone as we board the plane. just say upfront, dudes sorry. the next six hours may really suck. you can have a discount at akai.

i'm scared and nervous. returning may bring a flash of insecurities i thought i outgrew (or ran away from) when i moved away from arizona. away from family drama and strict state and 'little LA' where the norm is to be gorgeous without trying. i wonder how many boyfriends still live in phoenix or area. ex that is. he doesn't count as a boyfriend if you just went to dinner or movie and didnt even make out, right? that's just a date. had a lot of those.

well so is it ok with everyone if i am just me and dont have to hide in a corner and not participate in online discussions to be professional and what if i go back to the nurse field? I know of a lot of nurses who have good raunchy blogs. please dont make me hide. this voice doesnt want to be quiet and behaved ALL the time. i promise to only wear my blog uniform when i'm blogging. i'm just not good at the whole artist mystique thing.

can i vent about anxiety and antidepressants and implants and farts and rotten people who have road rage or the butthole who was rude to me yesterday and i totally took it personal?

well the baby just woke up so i have to start chasing him. i wonder if aloha can be brought to the mainland in large doses? i wonder if living in Hawaii really is like a fairy tale since a good portion of our visitors bring joy and happiness. the island is a happiness for so many people, all at the time time. i wonder if, overall, hawaii's tourist population nudges us over into a significant statistic suggesting that hawaii is the happiest state in the US? it's not very often we see a bitchy tourist. and most of the population of those who live here full time are ohana and very kind, generous people.

..question??...cuz i've forgotten mainland etiquette...is it ok to hug someone and touch cheeks when you first meet them? cuz that's what we do here. aloha spreads itself into hugs and cheek touchs or cheek kisses. am i gonna get clobbered if i do that to someone on the mainland?

am thinkin about the plane trip and gonna go throw up

a rather urgent reminder that i am taking off in...5 days

I know that sounds like plenty of time but MY LAST SHIPPING DAY is friday. period. I can't go to the post office on Saturday so this is it..I'll be back Feb 3rd and while we are away I'm not likely to be near a computer much. Am bringing my shitkicker boots and am returning to my roots.

Yesterday was a huge success. I'm permanently crippled from sitting at a computer and figuring out , in my head because we have no calculator, 35% off. My math skills have improved in less than 24 hours. I feel worthy again. I won't be running a sale like that again for a while. For those who missed it I'm sorry..it was a last minute decision spurred by extreme excitement for having a tall dark handsome articulate president in office. Bush has been in office the whole time akai has been in existence. I guess akai can survive anything.

well fair warning i have the baby all day so email replies will be slow and prioritized for those who just made purchases so i can get their orders out ..

the work begins

mmm arizona

photos of Mia Donna in Sedona

i am so happy at this moment..arizona in one week

arizona is my mantra, in one week i'll be wearing moccasins and running along sandstone again. happiness is bubbling up inside. yes, if we move there i'll bitch about summer heat and long for island weather. i told my husband i'll bitch no matter where we live. he knows.

i'm originally from california but normally tell people i am native arizonan because i lived there for so long..7 years in flagstaff (and spent a lot of time in sedona) and a few years in phoenix. oh how i dreaded phoenix. and yet i can't wait to get back again to familiarity and a grounding energy.

we are rushing like mad dogs to get everything done. of course we didnt find out till last night (had to clear it with ty's boss) but now we are free and we have tickets and oh i guess akai will be closed for 10 days or so

today i'm really glad i'm in hawaii

i dont like to capitalize or punctuate unless really needed.

today the weather was perfect. light breeze that lifted the skirt unexpectedly. warm sun. i'm glad that i'm not bundled up in cumbersome jackets or sitting next to a heater. hard to believe just a few years ago i was living in a house in colorado with no heat other than an old pellet stove that only heated up one room. we all had probably four thick blankets each.

in oahu we rarely used blankets. a few times in winter. here on the big island we use them, a sheet in summer and i have a plushy velvety blanket for winter. i bought it when i first moved to hawaii. i double up the baby's clothes at night because he always kicks blankets off. we don't have a heater in the house (no air conditioner either.

i've forgotten about the rain that poured for a few days straight and made me want to flee the island for the sun. in a few days i may crave the desert again.

the veil has lifted

Today I'm celebrating this artist http://www.flickr.com/photos/livingwilderness/37112050/

The importance of sunlight. After many many long days of gray skies (but not the flooding rain that was forecasted) the sun is racing upwards today and splitting light and colors all over Hawaii. Nothing is a better mood lifter than sunshine. I hear the state of Colorado has more sunshine days than Hawaii..too bad that it's freezing cold there! (akai was started in colorado, ironically).

Zackie is happily throwing blocks around our lit up room, the back lanai is flooded in light and the cats, after their usual meal, are already stretched out on the sun warmed pavement. I might join them..

but i'm not sleepy right now, sun and music energizes me and i'm about to lift off and do the usual ten thousand projects in less than two hours :)

i might go snorket at mid noon as the direct overhead light will make the blue underworld absolutely heavenly.

visiting big island and want to know of a good snorkeling spot?
http://ramblingjunketeers.blogspot.com/2008/04/champagne-ponds.html

texas

today i made a turd the size of the state of texas. i made the mistake of piggybacking curry (my deadly sin), a bowl of salty sweet kettle korn, and some decently strong but piss poor instant coffee with sugar free creamer. the sugar free creamer was a mistake. i hate getting home from the store realizing i paid hiked up hawaiian prices for dairy that doesnt have sugar in it. sugarless things taste like crap. same with fat free.

but anyways if you are suffering from constipation that stuff works like a charm. as much ass sitting as i've been doing lately i can't believe things are still moving freely. it's raining. again. it's just that gentle annoying rain that sits in your hair. we were supposed to be clobbered with record amounts of rain but i'm still waiting. it's ok it was a fine excuse to not dye much over the weekend. i've been with the mini diaper filler and he's quite the joy to be around.

my neighbors are arguing again. well more like death screaming. they have a 17? year old teenage girl. my condolences. as much as i wish for a tiny girl i can dress up and be my mini-me i dont envy those who have young women who have hormonal surges and a loud mouth.

after seeing only glimpses of the sun for the past four days , i am once again ready for arizona. i have this idea about a business card, a woman in a gray world and ther only color in the photo is an akai scarf around her neck, the trails blowing in the wind. take my idea and i'll cut your hands off. just kidding.

i belong to you

Today's featured artist, visit http://www.marias-arts.com/paintings.html

No one i know specifically, but an artist who caught my eye after another canyon conversation with a friend who lives in the desert. no he really lives IN the desert. he doesn't like walls unless they are golden or red and made of sandstone.

i belong to you canyon, i swore my life to you many years ago when i discovered you are my true home. but today i'm content on my island. i felt the cold of a northern front as i lay in bed, underneath a velvet blanket, and i was so happy to be warm. i dont like cold weather. i retract and my muscles ache and i curl up and crave fire. i never liked the snow. i didnt want to fall down and get wet so skiing never worked out. snow is for kids.

i dont like cold weather that has no reason to it. i love warm clothes, found some lovely wooly scarves lately that i'll be blogging about..Ellita i have not forgotten about you. i do not envy the fire stoves and the cold that creeps in when the shadows wane. nope i love my little tropical island today and i'm very grateful that tomorrow i can take this stuff to the post office and go stretch out on the fiery black sand somewhere and breathe with the goddess pele. i worship the sun.

this morning, once again..

i wake up with the insatiable urge to be back in the canyons of the southwest. how, might you ask, could i possibly want to leave hawaii?

have you ever noticed when you walk in the canyons your skin takes on a coppery orange glow? it completely saturates your senses.

it's a good idea to leave something for the wish list. it's a good idea to dream of a paradise, it keeps us going with hope. i'll be back in arizona soon, and will lust and dream about the ocean i left behind in hawaii. every time i hear hula music my stomach will churn in a good way. that's ok. churches remain special if you don't live in them.

i'm off to blend up wild canyon colors

photo of my long time friend, Elias

check out more stunning photos at www.eliasbutler.com